Tale of a Geek (II)

Okay, back to this. To recap...I was cute:





I danced a lot...




And I did theatre too. Here I am as Laura Ingalls in Plum Creek...a play I wrote myself as well as starred in. Yeah...I'd almost forgotten about that. It was...sixth grade, I believe. The year before I was in a Lewis & Clark play as Lewis...










Then I became gawky....

And Geeky...

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And then I moved to Indiana. I had high hopes for a 'new life'...but I'm afraid I remained in the geek realm. I was a flaggot...flag hag...I was in color guard. I started dating one boyfriend at a Star Trek Convention my junior year (Yes. I'm serious.) In fact, here we are a month later going out to a party...



But by just before my senior year I was not so much a geek anymore, at least I don't think so, in appearance. I still didn't have a ton of confidence...despite the fact that I did pageants (and did WELL in them), and was in dance, my self-confidence was shot. Here I am, slouching but pleasant enough, taking pictures for pageant stuffs...my hair was long, but not its longest...




I started dating Bryan. He was my first long term boyfriend...like we dated for three years, I think. We got 'engaged' *rolls eyes*...he was my first. He was also abusive. Emotionally and on rare occassion physically (I got slammed into a wall for saying 'no' one night). In my mind I thought I was happy. I thought I deserved a relationship like that. I was still the 'nerd' the 'geek'. It wasn't until years later that I learned the guys I crushed on in high school actually liked me back...and of course, it was too late then. Instead, I was with Bryan. By this time, looking back, I think I was pretty damn attractive, actually...totally not so geek like (although my love of STar Trek was still strong *lol*). As my prom picture displays, I was s'okay...but still with him.

Can you tell I regret being with him? I chose my college because of him. I got accepted to many schools, got a scholarship (small one that barely covered books, but a scholarship) to one...out of state schools, state schools...but I chose my school based on him.

Remember, I warned you before this all started...I was STUPID!!!! STOOOOPID!!!

So, I went to IU. One semester is all I lasted. I continued to date Bryan. I skipped class for Bryan...I only went to three days of classes. I don't COMPLETELY blame this on me dating Bryan. I also blame it on the fact that I went to college for something I did NOT want to do. That was NOT related to dance in any way...and I hated every minute of it.
Of course, adding to my stupidity is the fact that I continued to date Bryan when I could have had the hottie in that pic. *sigh* Yeah, he turned frat guy...but damn was he cute!!!

So, a semester at IU and I flunk out. I continue to date Bryan for another year and a half. I'm ashamed to admit that I begged him to stay with me when we broke up...but I was moving out of state anyway...so it's all for the best. It's an embarrassing part of my past...but it's one I learned from.
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Tomorrow I move on to North Carolina. Many things there...good school and birth of the DC.